Sunday, January 17, 1999

Valentine Resistance Movement

Resist St Valentine's Day! SMASH the hegmony of CONSUMER LOVE! Educate yourself! Save others! Cupid=Stupid. Join the Valentine Resistance Movement. Together we can make love a safer place.

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Thursday, January 14, 1999

Nation Celebrates As Busted Split

Scenes of mass jubilation not witnessed since 1945 have broken out in cities up and down Britain as the least significant UK band of recent years, Busted announce their split. A spokesman for the record label Universal said, "Who?"

Busted later confirmed that the split was because they were "completely shit, had no original ideas at all and were only in it for the money." The mantle of being the worst band in the UK had proved too much. This was later denied by Oasis who said that nobody was "badder than them" and threatened to "write" another song to prove it and punch themselves to show how hard they were.

Busted are survived by a tortoise and 3 fans.

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