Whelks, Chips and Plums

People everywhere are amazed by the glowing, healthy-looking shine they have after following the Blog of Funk Diet for only five weeks.

Barbara Dickson, from Albatross, Florida:

"When I started using the Blog of Funk Diet, my eyes were weak and I had lost my shine. Now after only six months, even my gazes are piercing, and I have a deep lustrous finish my girlfriends don't recognise! I've feel like I've won the lottery so many times that I own you!"

Henny Privates, from Weddington, England:

"My husband's apathy was legendary even among the dead and dying, but now the Blog of Funk diet has made moribund food a thing of the past. No more funerary salads in this house!"

You too can benefit from the natural smell of seafish, the undisputed biological power of the potato, and a small oval fruit - delicious and proven to nutrify at any age - and now, all day long!

whelks chips plums